When you’ve coached so long as I’ve, you find yourself studying plenty of classes. But most of them didn’t come from certifications, programs, or textbooks.
They got here from expertise—teaching others, teaching myself. And truthfully? From getting issues incorrect greater than as soon as.
One factor I look again on now and assume, What was I considering?! is one thing I used to consider was useful…
Something I noticed plenty of different coaches do, too: utilizing train as a type of punishment.
Ever educated a bit tougher after a weekend of indulgence?
Added an additional spherical on the health club since you skipped a exercise yesterday?
Felt the necessity to “make up for” one thing?
That was precisely the method I took with shoppers once I first began out.
You ate greater than you had been “supposed to” over the weekend? Let’s burn it off.
You’re late on your session? Guess what—we’ll make it “hurt” a bit extra.
It bolstered a message that’s been echoed for many years: No ache, no acquire.
Somewhere alongside the best way, motion stopped being a celebration of what our our bodies might do and a strategy to enhance their capability—and began turning into a device to repair what was “wrong” with them and one thing we solely do after we did one thing ‘bad.”
Food became the reward.
Exercise became the punishment.
And that, right there, is the problem.
Using Exercise as Punishment Changes Everything—Quietly and Deeply
Every time we treat movement as “the stick” for doing something wrong, we plant a seed. A seed that says: Exercise is something to be avoided.
Because no one looks forward to being punished.
Even when a workout isn’t meant to be punishment, that’s the affiliation we’ve constructed. We’re not transferring as a result of we wish to—we’re transferring as a result of we really feel we “have to.” And that’s how one thing constructive turns into one thing we dread. That’s how we go from wanting to maneuver to forcing ourselves to maneuver.
You can’t construct one thing constructive from one thing your mind has realized to worry.
And then we marvel why we’ve misplaced the motivation, the vitality, the thrill we used to really feel.
It Damages Our Relationship With Food—and With Ourselves
In the punishment mannequin:
Cake = further cardio.
Lazy weekend = Monday burpees.
But right here’s the reality:
Food isn’t one thing it is advisable earn.
And your exercise isn’t a “get out of jail free” card.
It’s additionally not an answer to cravings or overeating.
When we reinforce that meals = guilt and train = punishment, we strip away the chance to construct an empowered, wholesome relationship with both.
I bear in mind a shopper who overindulged nearly each weekend. And each Monday, I’d push them by way of an extra-tough session to “burn it off.”
What I didn’t do? Ask them why it stored taking place.
I did not see that my job as a coach wasn’t simply to “make up for” the habits…
It was to assist them perceive it. To get inquisitive about what was actually occurring. To work collectively to discover a extra supportive manner ahead.
We didn’t change something. We simply stored repeating the cycle.
That’s not teaching. That’s harm management.
It Embeds Shame—And Shame Doesn’t Create Lasting Change
Shame may get somebody to indicate up. It may push them to do yet another spherical, yet another dash, yet another cleanse.
But it doesn’t construct confidence.
It doesn’t create consistency.
And it undoubtedly doesn’t foster self-trust or long-term motivation.
What it does is make the coach the driving force.
Now the shopper reveals up not as a result of they see worth within the course of—however as a result of they wish to keep away from guilt, embarrassment, or disappointing somebody.
That’s not empowerment.
That’s worry.
And when worry is your important motivator, burnout, resentment, or avoidance simply follows.
Shame disconnects us from the why behind motion. It strips train of its pleasure, its function, and its actual advantages.
Why would we tie one thing as important and nourishing as motion to guilt, ache, or efficiency anxiousness?
And extra importantly: Shouldn’t we be doing it for ourselves—to not please another person?
What I’d Tell My Younger Coach-Self Today
I’d inform her:
I do know you thought you had been serving to.
But you had been reinforcing the identical tales your shoppers already believed:
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That they needed to earn their proper to eat.
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That their physique was an issue to be fastened.
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That being shamed into change was efficient.
I’d present her there’s a greater manner.
Because if a shopper “slips up” on their consuming plan, the answer isn’t to punish them with sweat.
It’s to ask:
What made that alternative really feel like the proper one in the meanwhile?
How can we assist you subsequent time to select that feels extra aligned to your objectives and values?
If somebody misses per week of exercises, the reply isn’t to crush them once they return.
It’s to assist them reconnect to their why. To remind them what motion does for them—not what it takes from them.
Movement Should Be a Partnership, Not a Punishment
As coaches, our job isn’t simply to appropriate.
It’s to get curious. To pay attention. To information.
To create a secure house for self-discovery.
To provide assist and accountability—however from a spot of respect and compassion, not management.
You don’t want to maneuver to make up for what you probably did—or didn’t—do.
You transfer to construct one thing:
A stronger physique.
A calmer thoughts.
A deeper reference to your self.
That shift—from punishment to partnership—is the place actual, lasting well being begins.
What would you inform your youthful self about utilizing train as punishment? —Marlene